This is not helping, Wei Ying thinks. This is neither job hunting nor relaxing. He can’t calm his thoughts, though. He knows how this works, he understands the vicious spiral of this thought process, but knowledge doesn’t equal ability not to fall into the trap. His mind will just go in circles, showing him the same images over and over again, but with more intensity each time, and he just—he’s too tired, too done with it, to let it happen.
He forgoes the nap and opens his laptop again, typing Hanguang-jun in the video search. This channel, run by Lan Zhan, who Wei Ying knows personally from before, from videoblogger meet-ups and other occasions, kept the last threads of his sanity during his worst days.
Source: Cloud Nine – Chapter 1, by mssdare – 陈情令 | The Untamed (TV) [Archive of Our Own] | https://archiveofourown.org/
This fic is nothing short of amazing. I started reading it because I’m seriously into ASMR, but I was completely pulled in by the way Wei Ying’s struggle with his mental health is depicted. Without magical cure (either by ASMR or Lan Zhan’s dick *g*) but with so much compassion and careful optimism.