He doesn’t say Before I saw you again, I used to wonder if I hadn’t died after all, and this was hell. It crosses his mind often, when things don’t seem quite real. It could be hell, or some other kind of punishment for killing without any reason except vengeance. But he always knows he’d do it again if he had the chance.
Adult, post-Winter Soldier, warnings for PTSD and some mild D/s.
Bucky might be the one who has to remember and then learn to live with the memories, but Steve needs him just as much. “Rain and Darkness Too” is wonderfully long, delving deep into these two and the immense, life-defining love they share. The follow-up fics are great as well – also, insanely hot.